‘Sup Unc!

Via The Joshua Commission

“Encourage the young men… In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity…” Titus 2:6-7

If a brother, uncle, guardian, mentor, or friend, I will give honor in all of my relationships. I will lead, teach, correct, and train in the spirit of righteousness.

Growing up in the Black community, it was normal to be surrounded by extended family. And I mean E.X.T.E.N.D.E.D. Cousins, cousins twice-removed (whatever that means…), aunts, uncles, great-uncles, grandparents—you name it. But then there was another kind of special family that mattered just as much: the “Stand in the Gap” Family. These were the “Play-Cousins”, the “Unc’s” and “Aunties”. They didn’t share your bloodline but shared your life. And sometimes, those bonds ran even deeper.

The old folks say this dynamic reaches all the way back to slavery when families were ripped apart by auction, death, or escape—and those who remained clung to one another like soul-woven kin. There’s truth there. Yet this kind of extended family isn’t unique to how I grew up. A TJC brother, raised in a Polish-Lithuanian Catholic household, told me last week “Yeah, we have that too.” Praise the Lord for commonality. God has always been about big, extended families.

Your Unc’s and uncles teach you about life. They fill in the blanks. They answer the questions you didn’t feel comfortable bringing to your parents. They offer wisdom without judgment, wrapped in a story—sometimes accurate, sometimes a little embellished, but always given with love and experience. They steady you. They guide you. They shape you.

Now, I find myself in the Unc phase of my life.

Gen Z might use “Unc” as a joke, but the truth is—it’s a title of honor. 

It belongs to the authentic man who’s lived life, learned some lessons, and is willing to share both the wounds and the wins.

Paul’s words to Titus reveal the heart of spiritual mentorship. When he says, “set them an example,” he is not calling Titus to flawlessness—he is calling him to authenticity and integrity. To be the kind of man who lives what he teaches. To let younger men see the whole story: the mistakes, the growth, the lessons, the redemption.

That’s the essence of being an Unc:

A stabilizing presence.

A voice of wisdom.

A life that speaks even when the mouth doesn’t.

When a man chooses to step into that role he becomes part of God’s design for extended family. A generational bridge, who passes on what was passed to him. And he honors God by living a life that others can model their own after.

Daily Battle Order:

Choose one younger man this week to intentionally check in on.

Text him, call him, take him for coffee—ask how he’s really doing. Listen. Encourage. Share something honest from your own journey. Let consistency—not perfection—be your testimony.

And if you can, reach out to your own Unc and say thank you.

Honor the man who helped steady you. A simple “I appreciate you” can carry more weight than you know.

THE KINGDOM MAN’S CREED

I am a Kingdom Man. I am created by God to bear His image. I am a son and viceroy for my Fathers work. I am a warrior, lover, teacher and king.

I am a Kingdom Man. Like Joshua, I will be strong and courageous. I will train my mind and body for the battles to come. I will discipline my heart, eyes and tongue to be steadfast and faithful to the calling on my life.

I am a Kingdom Man. If a husband, I love and serve my wife, if a father, a loving father to my children. I will love and lead them as Christ loves the Church. If a brother, uncle, guardian, mentor or friend, I will give honor in all of my relationships. I will lead, teach, correct and train in the spirit of righteousness.

I am a Kingdom Man. I am called to break down barriers and free others from strongholds. I am a Peace Maker. My armor is Truth, Righteousness, Grace and Humility. I will stand in the gap for my neighbor to defend gospel justice for the marginalized. 

I am a Kingdom Man. God is my provider. He has given me gifts and talents to exemplify Him with the work of my hands. I will work with diligence and excellence. My labor will be honest and its fruits purposeful.

I am a Kingdom Man with a Kingdom vision. Commissioned by Christ. My life is the Father’s. I am intentional. I will grow in my faith, be consistent in my actions and leave a legacy worthy of the race I have run.

I AM a Kingdom Man!