National Hugging Day: Run to the Other

"Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment." — Proverbs 18:1

via TJC

National Hugging Day began in 1986 when Reverend Kevin Zaborney noticed people seemed most emotionally down between the winter holidays and Valentine's Day, and wanted to encourage human connection through the simple act of a hug. When was the last time you hugged someone that you were angry with?

God Runs to Us

You know the story. The prodigal son squandered everything, hit rock bottom, came crawling home expecting to be a servant. Here's what the father did: "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him" (Luke 15:20).

The father ran.

He didn't wait for an apology. He didn't make his son grovel. He saw him coming and he ran. That's God. He pursues. He doesn't wait for you to clean yourself up before He moves toward you. "We love because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19).

He ran to you while you were still a mess. Now He's calling you to do the same.

Your Default is Isolation

When you're angry, run to the other person, not away. It goes against everything in you. Do it anyway. You get in a fight with your wife. What do you do? Walk to the garage. Sit in the car. Sleep on the couch. Give her the silent treatment for three days. Your child disrespects you. What do you do? Send him/her to their room. Avoid them the rest of the night. Stew in your anger until it turns into bitterness. A brother in Christ offends you. What do you do? Stop texting him. Avoid him at church. Wait for him to apologize first.

Ephesians 4:26-27 says, "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil."

You have until sunset. 

Not next week. Not when you feel like it. You have until Sunset.

A Hug is an Action

Words are cheap. "Let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth" (1 John 3:18).

Here's what a hug says when you're angry:

"I'm not going anywhere.""We're in this together.""I choose you even when I'm mad."

“I'm staying in this fight with you, not against you.”

Most men haven't hugged their wife when they're angry in years. Maybe ever. You hug when things are good. You retreat when things are hard. That's backwards. The warrior doesn't abandon his post when the battle gets tough. Running to the other when you're angry isn't a weakness. It's the hardest thing you'll do. It takes more courage to turn around and move toward conflict than it does to walk away.

Daily Battle Order

When conflict hits today:

1. Feel the anger. Don't deny it. Anger isn't sin. Walking away is.

2. Resist the retreat. Your body wants to leave. Stop. Stand still for three seconds.

3. Turn and move toward. Face the person. Take three steps toward them.

4. Initiate touch or at least closeness. Hug. Put your hand on their shoulder. Take their hand. Do something! 

5. Say the truth. "I'm angry, but I'm not leaving. We'll work through this."

This works in marriage. This works with your kids. This works with brothers in Christ.

Run to the problem. Run to the other. You're not responsible for their response. You're responsible for your obedience. Run to them anyway. Model what God does for us: He pursues even when we reject Him.

Don't let the sun go down on your anger. You have until sunset.