“Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.”
—Romans 1:24 NIV
This week, we’ve talked about the purpose of marriage, pre-martial manhood, and spiritual assault of marriage. Today, TJC discusses every guy’s favorite perk of being married: sex.
There I was, watching Garbage Reality TV with my wife… The Bachelor, ever heard of it? (I can hear you judging me on the other side of the screen!) This male contestant was down to the last two ladies he had to choose from to be his wife... One was a nice girl who he had great chemistry with. The other was a nice girl who he also had great chemistry with… so much so, they had sex the week before.
To my surprise, the man was deeply ashamed of having sex with the one woman before he gave away the final rose. The guilt actually drove him away from her & straight into the arms of the one he never shared intimacy with…
Let’s set the record straight here: Sex creates a spiritual connection. Period.
I’ll pose two break-up hypotheticals for you:
1. A man & woman begin romantically dating each other. Although they both understand God does not want them having sex before marriage, the desire to do so brings them “no choice.” So they do. Months later, they realize their personalities are just too different to see a lifelong marriage together and painfully decide to break-up.
2. A man & woman begin romantically dating each other. Although the desire is certainly there to have sex, they both understand God does not want them doing so before marriage. So they don’t. Months later, they realize their personalities are just too different to see a lifelong marriage together and painfully decide to break-up.
Simple question: Which break-up brought more emotional & spiritual baggage?
Obviously—no question about it—Break-Up #1 leaves a larger wake of pain, confusion, and suffering. It’s supposed to be more painful! That’s part of the “giving over” act God allows from today’s Anchor Verse. We all know it deep down: Sex is special. It’s (literally) chemical.
If it wasn’t, why does an aggregated assault lead to prison for several months, while a rape leads to prison for several years? Isn’t sex—regardless of consent—just “physical”? Of course not!
During the act of sex, two people become one flesh. It is totally symbolic of lifelong marriage designed by God. This holy sacrament is reserved between one husband & his wife.
Battle Order:
Have sex with your wife tonight! But this time, understand the spiritual connection you are furthering. Always remember every bit of intimacy in the bedroom starts with how you love her outside the bedroom.
If you aren’t married, your Battle Order is to keep that zipper up until Wedding Night. That’s what my wife & I did, and trust me—it was worth it!
The conversation continues tomorrow as TJC addresses the consequences of sex outside of marriage, particularly our effect as men on a woman’s reputation.
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