But a lover of hospitality, a lover of good men, sober, just, holy, temperate;
- Titus 1:8 KJV
In a recent Bible study group at church called Man2Man, we began the discussion of the misconceptions of the term “leader”.
We began the discussion with Moses and when he sat and judged the people’s matters, taking the whole day. Jethro tells Moses he’s going to burn out and he’s wasting time and energy. We tied in the time and energy it takes to achieve the qualities listed in Titus 1:6-9 alone and without help. Mistakenly, we use mottos such as, “if you want something done right; do it yourself”, “pull yourself up by your bootstraps”, etc.
The qualities in Titus 1 are often mistaken as applicable to only those in full-time ministry. Those in full-time ministry cannot achieve these qualities alone. However, as men, we often try to achieve these qualities without help. The fact is we were never asked to do it alone. Moses made the mistake of thinking he had to handle certain matters as the appointed leader, solo. However, God sent Jethro to speak into his life and show him a better way.
It has been life-changing to have men speak into my life at critical times to show me a better way. I once had my best friend and TJC brother talk me off the ledge of wanting to become President of the United States (LOL, okay that’s an inside joke), but that same brother has walked me through some of my hardest times in life as a man. More recently, a new found friend from a trip to Chicamauga took time to chat with me on the phone for nearly an hour just before Christmas regarding a messy work matter.
But how often do we truly listen and implement the advice given! I still fail to manage mental health well, because I continuously do not implement the advice given to me by my best friend, doctors, etc. to go exercise. Why is that seemingly so difficult to do or overcome? I honestly believe it’s because I focus so much on everything else and maintaining control that I place my own critical needs aside. I think to myself, I’m fine cause I can still do this and that, meanwhile acknowledging the loss of ambition, drive, strength, energy, ability to remain even keeled in emotions, etc.
The wisdom shared from brothers to help us take care of each other is love in action. It is designed to lift each other up to higher standards and achieve a standard of leadership that is unmatched, even without a title.
There is a reason God set up a “community of believers” - for accountability and encouragement (among many others). This way we CAN obtain the qualifications listed in Titus 1:6-9. We WILL burn out otherwise. We WILL suffer spiritual, mental and physical distress. So, we MUST be open and willing to be honest, transparent, repentant, and humble.
Daily Battle Order
We MUST ask God for the desire and willingness to implement what we are told, to share what we can offer, to press in, to go and do, and to build together. You cannot do it alone! Get over pride and ego. It all boils down to the fact that God wants us all to succeed and become “bishops” of our own earthly kingdom, achieving the qualities in Titus 1.